I keep boiling and boiling the more jealousy builds, will it take over? Will I lose all I’ve loved ? She can’t love my girl, she just can’t!!! She belongs to me and only me. Bitch back off!!! Just because your there and I’m here doesn’t mean that I can’t make my girl happy!!!

I am all alone,i wish i could get rid of all this depression and pain but it feels like a endless cycle. every day is the same thing just more pain and suffering i wish i could have a life when i am not worrying my girlfriend about what i will do to myself today and if i will cause myself anymore pain or will i stop my breathing.

i have a great girlfriend but i fear one day, she wont be able to tolerate me and my depressive episodes and will walk out of my life like everyone else that has said that they care about me and promised to always be there for me when i needed someone. she is my world my life, without her i believe i would of stoped breathing as ive wish so many times to stop the suffering for good.

I am all alone,i wish i could get rid of all this depression and pain but it feels like a endless cycle. every day is the same thing just more pain and suffering i wish i could have a life when i am not worrying my girlfriend about what i will do to myself today and if i will cause myself anymore pain or will i stop my breathing.

i have a great girlfriend but i fear one day, she wont be able to tolerate me and my depressive episodes and will walk out of my life like everyone else that has said that they care about me and promised to always be there for me when i needed someone. she is my world my life, without her i believe i would of stoped breathing as ive wish so many times to stop the suffering for good.

i feel as though my whole world is beginning to crumble all around me, all i feel is emptiness as those that were once around me slowly drift away as who would want a pathetic girl like myself. twisted into a viscous tornado being judge every moment of my life about my sexual orientation and there assumption that i fake my depression for attention. That i dont for several years ive fought to find who i am and beeing hated and laughed at for all of it. Now every moment of my life i wish for my end to come to save me from the pain and suffering i wake up every morning to feel. what is my purpose of life? ¬†everyday i fake a smile and say ” im ok” or ” im fine” when really im not im falling apart at the seams. There will come a day when i wont wake up in the morning and those who judged me might feel what they have done.

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It’s just one of those days when I look back and wonder how my life would of been if I never had met back with my beautiful girlfriend and I’ve came to the conclusion I would be feeling completely empty.